Reading Notes: Mahabharata Reading A:
1. Vyasa & Ganesha
2. King Shantanu & Ganga
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
It may be interesting to switch up the characters so that the woman actually has power over the males. "she would wed the king, but said she must needs at once depart from him if he spoke harshly to her at any time or attempted to thwart her in doing as she willed " That is nice but then it is ruined by her killing her babies. It is strange. Not really appropriate for children's rhyme.
3. King Shantanu & Satyavati
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
The miraculous birth is good but I don't like the fishy thing. Because she would marry him she wouldn't stink. I don't like that when she "became a virgin again" that is when her smell went away. That perpetuates a negative perception of people who are not virgins and could be harmful.
4. Devavrata's Vow
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
I like that they use dialogue. It helps to break it up. There are not any aspects of the story that I would like to include in my story.
5. Bihisma at the Swayamvara
Source. Myths of the Hindus and Buddhists by Sister Nivedita (1914).
This story could be a good inspiration to the beginning of a story. I do think that I would like to draw from other inspirations.
6. Amba
This story could use a feminist update... The line ""But how, being a woman, can I achieve victory in battle?" I could rewrite the story to be more progressive.7. Dhritarashtra & Pandu
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
These stories suffer because of how they are told. They are in need of better word choice to express the tone better.
8. Kunti & Her Son
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
I am not a fan of polygamy so I would not add that in my story. The spectacular beauty, because she is supernatural, makes me think of harry potter. That could be a plot to a story and add it to another story.
9. Pandu & His Wives
Source. The first part is from Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913)
I think that the end needs to be broken up. It is too dense compared to the top.
10. The Sons of Pandu
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
I like that aspect that the people could transform. They were attacked in their animal form. It reminds me of my brother bear. It may be interesting to mix these stories.
11. Gandhari & Dhritarashtra
Source. The first part is from Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913)
It could be cool to write a story over a mom of 100 children. I also like that the favorite became bad and evil. It shows what spoiling children looks like. It could be the foundation of a story.
12. Pandavas & Kauravas
Source. The first part is from Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913)
I like the simile in there that is something I would like to incorporate.
13. Bhima & the Nagas
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
The word distribution is good in this story. I like the poison aspect. It could be really fun to draw some inspiration from this story to add to my rhymes.
14. Drona
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913)
This story has good distribution in the length of paragraphs. I really like the two friends wanting their kids to be friends as well. It would fun if they become rivals. I like begger and ruler. But I rather it be more strong hatred.
15. Drona Trains the Princes
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
This is very tell not show. That is not very good storytelling. I wish it showed us how he was so talented.
16. Ekalavya
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
This is awful. I can't believe they shot arrows at a dog's mouth. that is not ok. I like that he cut his thumb off and the warriors followed him. I would write a rhyme about this one.
17. The Contest
Source. Mahabharata, Epic of the Bharatas, by Romesh C. Dutt (1898)
This is a good reference to look at. There are some really good rhymes in this one.
18. The arrival of Karna
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913)
I like that there is some dialogue. This is not the syle I am going for my story but I think that it succeeded what it was going for.
19. Drona's Revenge
Source. Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913).
The line "his chariot like to the fire which consumeth all things at the end of time. This itself could inspire a story.
20. Duryodhana's Jealousy
Source. The Indian Heroes by C. A. Kincaid (1921).
This makes me think of the Red Wedding from GOT. This would be GREAt to write a rhyme about.
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